Wednesday, January 28, 2009

The 35+ Male Life Changing Decision


An interesting article from Self Growth (I fixed some typos, and there is some weird-ass grammar, but otherwise this is pretty good). Try to ignore the bad writing and harvest the wisdom that is offered here.

The 35+ Male Life Changing Decision

by Jason McDonald

Well, if you have made it into the 35 plus club you can testify to having travelled a journey. Most of us have probably experienced multiple jobs, have married and created the nuclear 2.3 child family. Yet what is it for the majority of males that they feel a sense of emptiness or seem like we are lacking some major gratification?

You can argue that the imminent big 40 is now fast approaching and we are yet to accomplish something in excess of our current position. Well back the truck up, you are a long time from dead. With advances in technology and medicine, chances are you're not even at the half way mark in this game we call life.

The most common trait in the typical 35+ males life is the belief of not having locked away the dream career, or more popular still, deciding if you have enough courage to step into self-employment. For those seeking independence and a truly rewarding lifestyle, this can conceivably be one of life's biggest challenges. I am often a magnet for this male demographic, who open up to this state of confusion in their life with me.

To break this down further is to explore the two biggest human motives we encounter in life, and make no mistake macho men, these two emotions are fear and love. Nearly every human driving force is derived from these two emotional factors. How you may ask?

When we are motivated by fear, and contrary to belief we use security and stability, which are outcomes of our actions, these can best be described as being in a fear based emotion. Turn the tables and be in an environment of happiness, support and caring for others, and you feel the presence of love.

So when you cannot face a life changing experience know that any excuses or objections are fuelled by fear. So why do we fear the future? Because we have had 35+ years of good or bad judgement to sway our decision making process. So when we step out of our comfort zone, our subconscious mind, or our library of historical events and experiences, throws up a red light warning us of a failed comparable time.

Psychologists have estimated that our emotive fears or worries result in 87% of concerns never coming to fruition, yet we continue to be critical of hope or a better way of life. The founder of McDonalds restaurants, Ray Kroc, was quoted as saying if you are not prepared to take a risk, then get the hell out of business. Life really is no different - we were put on this earth to encounter challenges and real problems. How boring would life be if it was that predictable you did not bother to take a chance?

Let us take a look at dreams and what they can mean and how you extract the wisdom. Take solace in finding and dedicating some quiet time for you. In today's modern world of equal rights and sharing, a lot of us are now committing more time to the household family experience than ever before.

Our fathers worked their bodies to the core and more often than not left the family chores and upbringing of kids to their wives. Today as life becomes more technically advanced we are finding new ways to look busy in our newly created free time. So back to you, work out when is your best time in the day or week for some selfish me time.

What to do with this time is ponder, meditate, or whatever takes your fancy. Then focus on what brings you alive, that feeling of "I am invincible," or when you sense that sensation of joy. For some it might be going on holidays, or taking a test drive of your dream car, or you may have an underlying passion or hobby that simply needs exploiting. You will know it by what I like to call that good gut feeling when you know you cannot fail. Once you have identified what it is for you in that feel good moment, apply that to your dedicated time of reflection.

It will be in this reflection that you will start to unearth your life purpose. Some may say I have been on a mission in search of my purpose for some time, yet I have not unearthed it. This is common and not a time to beat yourself up. Yes it can be harder to take risks when you have the responsibility of family and commitments. Though give yourself the privilege of at least acknowledging what makes you happy. Not all of us get to do what we love as a career, so allow the possibility there is scope to at least get a taste for it.

To draw the ultimate comparison is to ask yourself, "what I would do if I knew I couldn't fail?" Let these ideas flow, perhaps put pen to paper to capture these thoughts. Now most of these thoughts will not be new, there will be events, people and places where you have enjoyed that feel good experience. Another way of identifying what you need to do is relate to a time where things were falling into place and you were on a high, there will be some point in life that you can reflect upon.

We can easily expand upon the many techniques to identify where you are at in your life, and those techniques can be shared by simply visiting the author of this article, and requesting more information on unlocking your purpose. Remember you are not alone, so continue to communicate with other like minded 35 plus males that exhibit a positive mental attitude, if you attract the doom and gloom people you get just that. Rest assured life need not be difficult, it is us that makes it hard.

Make today the first day of the rest of your life.

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Author's Bio
Jason McDonald writes on metaphysics and helps people unlock their life purpose. Lyn, his wife, is a qualified professional counsellor and guides people back to good mental health. You can visit their site to find out more useful information at positivelifecounselling.com.au

This is pretty good advice, although I may be a little bit biased. I made some major changes in my life around the age of 35, completely changing direction in my career and moving to a new city. The relationship that prompted those changes did not last, but it got me out of my rut and set me on a new path that keeps evolving as time goes on.

It can be too easy to stay with what we know and not take risks, and we might take risks that don't pan out, but just being willing to do it and taking those steps can be enough to shake up our lives and get us living the life we were born to live.


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